6 Openly Queer Indians Share Their Advice On Coming Out

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Dear Gay People,

Here are 6 incredibly brave Indians based in Singapore who came out, and lived to tell the tale.

1. Patricia (Lesbian)

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It took me 2 years to come out to tell my family and friends.

During those 2 years, I was so afraid of being rejected and being criticised due to the Indian mentality. But I decided to be brave and come out to the world.

A lot of my friends have left me but I now have more friends who love me more than I could ever love myself.  That joy is priceless.You will definitely learn to take the negative comments in your stride. Thats what I did. Because it’s gonna be me who needs to feel happy.

Come out and see how REAL people will love you endlessly!♡

2. Gabriel Mark (Gay)

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I’ve always felt like you don’t really have to “come out” to anyone.

Everybody else will be ready when you are. The day you feel comfortable being yourself is the day everything feels carefree.

3. Sham (Trans Man)

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Many Indians are still living in fear. Fear of society, Fear of family and friends. Fear of how others will judge them. But they need to understand that these people aren’t gonna be there forever. This is your battle. You have to fight for it.

I’ve heard many Indians say that they can’t come out to their family because they will get chased out. Or that they can’t come out because society will judge them. If you are only think for others and stay closeted, who’s gonna think for you?

So choose what’s best for you.

4. Bhas Karan (Gay)

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The Indian community is not that small in Singapore. There won’t be a chance where my mother would know your mother. There is no need to hide when you see me or any other Indian gay men for that matter.

5. Sheni (Pansexual)

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I know it’s scary out here. Having to come out is not a one-time thing and I still feel nervous about it. But it also gets awful lonely in the closet. As much as there may be rejection, there are also plenty of us here would like to meet you.

There’s also no rush. I only did it when I was ready and I think it’s okay to only do it when you feel it’s safe enough.

6. Indulekshmi Rajeswari (Bisexual)

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If you are not with someone who accepts you for who you are, you deserve better. Bisexuality is not some dirty secret you shove under the carpet when you meet your partner.

Family and friends, even the most well-meaning ones, will be purposefully or accidentally awful to you. That is unfortunately part and parcel of our complex identity.

But stand tall, try not to yell at them and remember that their ignorant remarks are a reflection of them, not you.

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You might also like to read:

Out Of The Closet: Sheni Shares Her Story

5 Asians Over The Age Of 40 Reflect On How Growing Up LGBT Was Like For Them

6 Singaporean Same-Sex Couples Share The Heartwarming Stories Of How They First Met

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One comment

  1. Hooray finally some dark skinned Indians and they’re gay! (sarcasm) SMFH. Now I have nothing against homosexuals, in fact this was a really good insight to Indian gays, it’s just it is so frustrating that I have spent my entire life waiting for dark skinned Indian representation, especially in the dating game and the one time they are represented they are gay. All my life being a dark skinned Indian has plagued me when it comes to dating and I hoped I could find solace in others like me who discuss their dating lives.

    Anyway like I said it was still a good read, I would definitely love to know the effect on colourism on Indian gays and if dark skin is as much of a burden for straight dark skinned Indians

    Like

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