Tag: satire

Super Gay Things About Singapore To Petition Against Instead Of Adam Lambert

Dear Straight People, Now that your petition against Adam Lambert has obviously failed since Adam’s still scheduled to perform at the New Year Eve’s countdown party, here are some other super gay things about Singapore to petition against instead! 1. The colour of our IC   Frankly, I’m quite surprised no homophobes with too much

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5-Step Guide To Being Truly Straight-Acting

Dear Gay Men, Judging from many of your Grindr profiles, the demand for ‘straight-acting’ men doesn’t seem to be wavering anytime soon. Since gay men are so obsessed with achieving heterosexual masculinity, this guide will provide you with everything you need to know about becoming a truly straight-acting male! Step 1: Get a beer belly!

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How To Become High-Profile

Dear Gay People, If you want to climb the imaginary gay social ladder, then you’ve come to the right place. This article will teach you everything you need to know about becoming ‘high-profile’ in the gay scene. By ‘high-profile’, I mean a lot of people in the gay community will know who you are but

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Ok Fine, Homosexuality Is Totally A Choice!

Dear Straight People, For years and years, you lot have been preaching that homosexuality is a choice and for years and years, the gay community has vehemently denied it. Since this debate isn’t reaching a consensus anytime soon, I’m going to throw in the towel because I’m tired of arguing with you. Fine I admit

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10 Ways To Deal With Homophobic People

Dear Gay People, Check out the following 10 ways to deal with homophobic people that will upset them more than they will upset you! 1. Glare at them like they are retarded 2. Tell them to get a life 3. Piss them off by being even more fabulous than you already are 4. Tell them

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I Hate Straight People And This Is Why!

Dear Straight People, I’ve had enough! For far too long, I’ve had to put up with your heterosexual nonsense but honestly, I don’t think I can deal with you lot anymore. That’s right! If you haven’t guessed it by now, I’m going to spell it out for you; I am heterophobic! And I have very

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